It’s 1994. “Macho Man” Randy Savage is on TV. After he finishes beating the crap out of someone, he demands that I “Snap into a Slim Jim!!” I’m 12 years old and he has thoroughly convinced me. Was it his threatening tone? The subconscious promise of increased masculinity? The way he articulates its beefiness? No clue. But I really do WANT to snap into a Slim Jim. It’s meat. It’s packaged and ready to eat! Herbs and spices. Funky taste. Fucked ingredients. In a stick! At the gas stations everywhere! Even though I politely pass on Skinny James at this point, there’s a lot to be said: some good and some bad, but either way, we learned a lot.
Let’s be honest, shortcomings aside, the idea behind Skinny James was solid: transportable, nonperishable meat that was supposed to taste good. At the end of the day, you’ve got a product and several others like it that must legally be referred to as a “meat stick”: a bastardized mash-up of shitty ingredients. And there’s the very real possibility that I’m imparting way too much of my own personal bias here, but I’d feel confident making a substantial wager that YOU aren’t bolting into gas stations and convenience stores when refueling to restock on meat sticks. Or has the cup holder in your automobile been repurposed as a meat stick holder?! You know, in the past 10+ years on social media, I’ve seen photos posted of countless automobile interiors and have yet to see a bundle of meat sticks in any center console. So, unless they’re tucked away in the glove compartment, I think it’s safe to say everyone is all set with meat sticks.
HOWEVER, though we may deny meat sticks, their foul taste and their weird ingredients, I feel confident in saying that most of us want and would enjoy a high-protein FOOD that can be utilized on the go. The reality is that most of us go to great lengths to plan and prepare our meals. We know that many of our goals rely heavily on following an ideal diet, and a massive part of following that diet is having our food when we need it. Work and plan and prep though we may—we all know that there will be times when we get jammed up, pressed for time, and otherwise unable to have a regular meal. We would all benefit from food that travels well, helps us hit our macros, is natural, and if it tastes good on top of all that, then that’s really something. Shakes and bars have traditionally been our go-to in this instance, and they will continue to fill gaps, but to have another option would be great. It’s safe to say that the majority of us make animal protein the foundation of our diet: poultry, fish, and steak serve as the backbone of most nutritional strategies. To have a product that gives us the same nutritional advantages of meat, without having to worry about preparation, spoilage, or the inclusion of unwanted ingredients, would be massively advantageous. Enter ANIMAL Beef Biltong.
ANIMAL has closed the gap between bastardized food products like meat sticks and the fresh, wholesome animal protein that the majority of us use as the foundation of our diets. ANIMAL considered all the reasons meat products and jerkies weren’t taken seriously. We fixed what was broken, and we’re proud to present a product that aligns with the nutritional philosophies of most serious athletes. It’s 2022. We don’t want fillers or weird extraneous ingredients. We want real stuff that is intact and not bastardized. We want the option of hitting our nutritional requirements with foods that have more in common with the whole foods that make up our diets. The reality is that the majority of us would never consider a meat stick a viable form of nutrition. And while there are several jerky products that might serve as an upgrade, the inclusion of funky ingredients and the harsh methods used to process these products make them only slightly more viable. However, ANIMAL Beef Biltong is a premium product containing only beef, vinegar, salt, herbs, and spices. That’s it! And while jerky is cooked at high temperatures, Biltong is air-dried and cured, resulting in a product that is not only texturally superior and delicious but also nutritionally superior as well! How? Air drying rather than cooking leaves enzymes, vitamins, and minerals intact! It’s truly a superior product, and it’s as close as you can possibly get to having a snack form of the fresh animal protein upon which you base your diet.
For years, bars and shakes have been the only REAL high-protein option for those seeking nutrition on the go. I don’t think there’s ANYONE out there who wouldn’t appreciate the nutritional value and wholesome nature of beef if it were made transportable and easily accessible, without spoilage or extraneous ingredients being a factor. We’re proud to present ANIMAL Beef Biltong. It’s simple, clean, delicious, and it is sure to fit your nutritional strategy.
